||[Mar. 27th, 2005|07:41 pm]
|[||my funny little feeling
|||||I can't belive i found you||]|
i put up a post that wasnt good..so i took it off..if yo uread it..woopty doo for you..if you didnt odnt worry about it
anyways..i was suprised by caity's post..and andy's post just wowed me,
to andy: for the past week ive been moody and not as good as i should be too you, and even with me puttin that post, you defended me 100% i love you so much, i honestly dont know what i would do with out you, you treat me so well you would do anything for me.. and i just..i just love you so much i cant even tell you how much
to kyle: thanks for being nice about the post it helps alot
liebedich4ever - "well I'll never be sorry for pushing my ways on you, i'll never be sorry for saying you and him are wrong, i'll never be sorry for telling you that you can do better, i'll never be sorry for hating you for killing your baby with that fucking pill, i'll never be sorry for saying that the way you go about your relationship is all wrong, i'll never be sorry for hating him, and i'll never feel sorry for you again."
bitter resentfulness is never the way to go
caring pity works much better, no matter the situation or what they think of what you say/do
First off, this has nothing to do with the subject, you're just looking for a reason to rant
Second, "well I'll never be sorry for pushing my ways on you" that is one of the stupidest things that you have ever said, they are exactly what you just said they are, Your Ways, not her's, she has her own ways, you always tell people, especially me how impressionable she is and that you think i am using that to my advantage to get what i want, when that is EXACTLY what you are trying to do, you are trying to use how impressionable you think she is to push YOUR ways upon her and make her think what YOU want her to think, to make her the way YOU want her to be, to protect her from the things that YOU think are bad
Well i got news for you dear, she has her own mind, she makes her own decisions, she does things her way, shes a real person and it's time for YOU to realize that, not anyone else, because your the one that doesn't truely look at her as her own person
As you've said before, you see her as a gullable person, easly pushed into doing things, easly talked into things without "protection". Well she doesn't need your protection anymore, shes can take care of herself, shes a big girl now, she doesn't need you to fight for her anymore, especially when there is nothing to fight
Third, Her and I are NOT wrong and never will be, no matter what you think or say, I Love Her, i love her more that you could ever fathom, i would do anything for her, i would die for her, she is my life, my love, my everything, and i will stand with her untill the end of eternity. You only think we are wrong because you don't know the true extent of our relationship, she it not only the love of my life, but also my best friend, i confide in her everything that i ever think, i tell her everything. I would NEVER be after "just sex", as you'ver said before, yes we have sex, and yes we may do it more than most, but that DOES NOT mean that it is the only thing that i want and the only thing that i care about, you do not know me, you know NOTHING about me, you know about the old me, you know about the me that i left behind a long time ago, and not much about him either. You do not know about ME, you know nothing of my intentions, you know nothing of my thoughts, my beliefs, my life. I will tell you, though i don't need to, i will tell you about my intentions, my intentions are pure, my intentions are true, not matter what you think, i intent to spend the rest of my life with Melissa, i intent to care for her and take care of her when needed throughout life, i intent to provide for her, i intent to stay with her, i intent to make and keep her happy, i intent to listen to her, i intent to give her all that i can give her, and most of all i intent to Love Her With All The Love Humanly Possible And More. So NEVER tell me MY intentions toward to the love of my life, you can tell me about Melissa and I just about as well as i can tell you about You and Tyler, i could make many assumptions about you two, i could say many things, but i don't, because i respect that you love him and that he loves you, so why in hell can't you just give up on your lost cause of stopping this and accept that i love and don't want to hurt her?
Fourthy, she probably could do better, i do not think that i am pefect in any way, shape, or form, nor do i say that i am, no one ever said that she had done the best that she could do, she is the most beautiful, nice, kind, caring, loving human being that i have ever had the grace to meet and she could probably find a rich, sucessful, nice guy to care and provide for her, but i can garentee you and will put my life on the FACT that she will NEVER find someone that loves her and wants to be with her more than i do, she will NEVER find someone that wants to spend the rest of their life and longer with her more than i do, she just won't, cause it is not possible in any way to feel greater that i do about her, no matter how hard anyone tries, no one can come close to fathoming the possibility of think about caring about her even 1/100000000 the amount i do.
Fifthly, she never killed a baby, she has never been pregent in any way, she has never had anything in her body close the being a child that she could have killed. There was never a baby to kill. You have no reason to hate her for that, because she didn't do anything, she was being cautious, i don't know what information you got, but i can tell you, knowing first hand, cause i dealt with it, that she was never pregent, she never had a child in any way, shape or form, and she never kill a child in any way, shape or form, she was being extra cautious, that is all.
Sixthly, the "way we go about our relationship" is not wrong at all, once again i think that you have not got all information on a sugject that you are objecting, yes, yes we do have sex, and we did do it quite a lot, a very lot in fact, but that it not all we did, we talked, we still do, we have always talked, and we always do, we talk all the time, about everything, if there is anything to talk about, we talk about it, but we also make love, there is nothing wrong with have sex with the person that you love, and having a healthy relationship otherwise, i don't give a crap what you have to say on the subject, we have a good healthy relationship, and no, contrary to what you belive i am not saying that because i am a sex loving pig that is happy with our relationship because as you so wonderfully think "i get all the sex i want", i am saying it beacuse it is true, we did have sex quite a bit, but NOT because i made her do it and tricked her into thinking that it is the right things to do, it is because we love each other and we both enjoy it, so don't ever think i make her do anything like trick her into having sex with me, because i have never "tricked" her into anything, ever, she always makes her own concious decisions.
Seventhy, She Doesn't Need You To Feel Sorry For Her
Finaly, i don't even know why i am ranting to you about all of this, because it know it won't help, no matter how much i show it, no matter how much i care, no matter what i say or do, there is nothing i can do to chance your narrow scope of thought on this subject, i can only hope that the truth will open your eyes and you will realize that it is all in fact true, and that i do in fact love her with every fiber of my being.
Thank You For Taking Your Time To Read This And Have A Good Day
i love you andy, thank you for always being there for me, helping me with everything, and helping me become my own person, letting me make desions, never putting me down for any stupid things that i do, you helped me so much you will never know, you made my life complete you helped me stand on my own two feet again, and support me when i start to fall back down, or when i just need some one there to hold me threw rough times, you have given me everythign i need in life, and you keep giving it, thank you for always being there, you bring out the best me, i love you, I Love You, I LOVE YOU! and i cant say it enough, thank you so much